"James Gallagher" (jgallagher)
01/29/2014 at 21:44 • Filed to: None
25
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"James Gallagher" (jgallagher)
01/29/2014 at 21:44 • Filed to: None | 25
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With a hollow cough, the four inline cylinders turn over. The cabin fills with the halfheartedly dampened sound of 126 anemic horses humming. I release the lumpy plastic key fob and settle into the drab cloth seats. I'm searching for comfort, but deep down I know that no amount of fiddling will bring the seat to a comfortable position. Dull gray plastic glares back at me from every angle. From the headliner to the carpet, nothing but gray. This is the first time 50 shades of gray would be appealing, because at least they would release me from this monotonous one. As I slip the idiotic gearbox with a clunk into "drive," it lurches on its way, and wallows towards the driveway's end. Here am I, a car guy sitting in the blandest of cars, like a disappointed promotion-seeker confined to a cubicle. And I love it. It's a slow, uncomfortable pile of boring junk. But I love it.
Out on a summer's day, the air warm and pleasant for a Sunday drive, I'll pass another car enthusiast. You can usually identify them by the cars they drive. A flash of the lights to a pair of classic Minis, a thumbs up to the Tesla, a toot of the horn to the smiling old man in the C2 Corvette. But still, when they're cruising in their prides and joys, it must be hard for them to take a thumbs up seriously from a guy in a Corolla. I can practically feel the disapproval oozing out as we pass each other by, and see the thought in their mind: "I bet that kid doesn't even know what I'm driving." But I don't mind. I could shoot the shit about their cars as well as any beer-guzzling garage monkey.
Cars have always been a part of my life, and always will be. Just ask my mom and dad, who to this day have "Cars and Trucks and Things that Go" memorized from reading it to me so many times.
Yet, as you well know, the car culture is very elitist. Let's be real, ladies and gentlemen, we are. The community aggressively includes those who seem to know their facts, and aggressively dismisses those who don't. I've found myself thinking it at car shows, somehow believing that I have more knowledge than everyone else around me. That guy behind me talking about his Impreza? I bet his parents bought it for him and he doesn't even know what a turbo is. We all do it. We often forget that it's easy to love cars without knowing anything about them. But when you see a Tesla on the road, you smile, even if you don't recognize it. The Model S is a beautiful, sleek car, and even if I didn't know what it was or anything about its battery packs or its dealer woes or its quarterly profits, I could still recognize its beauty as it rolled down the street. But it's difficult to foster your love of cars, and to have others take that love seriously, without a wealth of knowledge. Enthusiasts will even test how "real" a car person you are: !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! If you don't know the answer, you aren't a real enthusiast.
!!! UNKNOWN CONTENT TYPE !!!
Bullshit. What's a shame is when we think we need to ask the question.
I have knowledge about cars. I know you have knowledge about cars. You're here. But what are we doing with all that knowledge? Sometimes it feels like we're hoarding it, desperately burying it in the ground so that the unwashed masses can't get their hands on it. I'm not saying we all do this, but I see it a lot: ignorance is treated like stupidity. We must aspire to share our car-nal knowledge (anybody?). Share it without condescension, without judgment, and without testing. That's what drives me to keep writing. (ha, you catch that one?) We need to stop looking down upon people who think our cars are cool just because they're driving a Corolla. Whether the kid behind that wheel knows anything or not, he is just as entitled to his excitement whether or not he knows or cares what they're doing to Lancia.
And every time I sit behind that wheel and I stamp my foot down and wait years to feel the antiquated mechanicals kick in, it reminds me what I love. I love the whiny noises when the revs get high, I love the wind rushing through, I love knowing how it all works and what had to come about before my Corolla, got here. I love feeling it kick down as my foot nears the floor, kick down again, and again, and finally surge forwards. The car is a piece of junk, and I wouldn't think twice before exchanging it. But more importantly, just because I drive a Corolla, doesn't mean I'm not a car guy. Just because I'm not driving something interesting, doesn't make me any less of an enthusiast. And we need to work on accepting newcomers who haven't learned as much as many of you. And I love my Corolla because it reminds me this every time its wheezy engine kicks to life. God bless, you beige son of a bitch.
James Gallagher is a struggling college student who hit it big as a writer and a thinker when, moments after his birth, he scrawled several proposed endings to Hemingway's A Farewell to Arms on one of his unused diapers, surprising his parents and his doctors alike. Story and photos copyright (c) James Gallagher 2014.
dogisbadob
> James Gallagher
01/29/2014 at 21:49 |
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The Corolla is an awesome car until you get to 299999 miles, then the odometer just stays there and there's no fix even after 10 years.
126 hp seems more than adequate to me, though. My car has 188 hp which is friggin a lot. But I've driven Civics with less power than your car and it's fine.
Even though your Corolla may not quite be a third-gen Camry, at least you can get Bilstein shocks for it!
I Like Corollas
> James Gallagher
01/29/2014 at 22:04 |
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Another Corolla lover here! It may be beige, boring and slow, but it does it's job perfectly fine and that's what i love about it.
To me, anybody who loves and cares about what they drive (or cars in general) is a car person.
ihm96
> James Gallagher
01/29/2014 at 22:05 |
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Awesome writeup! I always try to educate people and teach them instead of being snobbish. And honestly its very understandable why most car enthusiasts in the US (where I live) wouldn't know about Lancia, because one it was before their time and they don't sell them here. Before oppo the most I knew was they had a cool car in Forza. Even when there are ricers or brotruck or muscle car enthusiasts, I try to not think I'm better or more cultured just because I know about european sportscar racing. Many of us can be snobby (me too, im not perfect) because we like european things, but then we complain about BMW owners being snobby. Keep writing, this was awesome!
ssidd47
> James Gallagher
01/29/2014 at 22:15 |
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This is a pretty great post, James. I drive a car that's not really super enthusiast material either, but I still love it.
I respect cars that seem to be loved and cared for, regardless of what they are. 1990 Corolla that's well kept and thoroughly enjoyed by its owner is far cooler and more valuable than an E30 driven by a dude who just doesn't care.
Burrito de EJ25
> James Gallagher
01/29/2014 at 22:38 |
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FRONT PAGE! FRONT PAGE!
This was beautifully well put.
All Motor Is Best Motor
> James Gallagher
01/29/2014 at 23:10 |
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I inherited a 2001 Corolla S with 24,000 miles last year. In ways it's more fun to drive than my 01 Acura Cl Type S. Only because it's exactly 1,000 lbs lighter, though. Slow car fast.
Singhjr96
> James Gallagher
01/29/2014 at 23:23 |
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I hear you. I have loved cars for quite a while now and I remember driving a minivan for a year and learning how to drive in that car. I thought it was the worst thing ever to drive. Now it is a car that I love and would not trade. Even with its terribly stained interior, horrible speakers, dent on the side, and meager horsepower that comes from a v6, and value of less that $2000. A thing that bonds a person with there car more I believe is what memories they have in them, and boy did I have some good memories in that van. We would fit anywhere from 5-12 people and go to mcdonalds everyday after school and before football workouts, and we had a lot of fun memories in that minivan. Even though it's at 223,000 miles and falling apart me and my friends still think it is one of the dopest things ever. I also drove my mom's camry for a couple of months and loved it.
Stef Schrader
> James Gallagher
01/31/2014 at 00:34 |
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It's not what you drive, it's how you drive it.
Well said.
LongSnake
> James Gallagher
02/04/2014 at 18:32 |
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I have a corolla xrs and I love the thing like its my baby.
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55_mercury
> James Gallagher
02/04/2014 at 18:38 |
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Think me and you are sort of on the same line of thinking. I love cars too. I could afford a nicer car as well. But I drive nothing but pieces of shit old econo-boxes. One is a 12 year old Prius. The other a 18 year old taco. I guess to me its sort of like this: Sure, I'd love to have something like a Tesla, vette, Caddy CTS. But then again I don't really want to spend 50,60, 90K+...on a car. Hell- even 25-30k seems like a lot for something that even if brand new will probably give me joy and excitement over it being new and all for exactly 3 months.
Ironically I am actually quite proud of my cars. The longer they stay on the road, the more pride I have in them. They build " character" as the paint fades, the windshields get cracks, and the engine builds up the miles. Its also about the memories. My Taco was bought new when I graduated high school in 1996 in order to use for mowing lawns. I had no idea I would still have it now almost 20 years later now married with a mortgage. Its been with me for a looong time and I can't imagine getting rid of it now, we've been together for way too long.
whatisthatsound
> James Gallagher
02/04/2014 at 18:48 |
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I only had two issues with the 2010 corolla my s/0's mom gave her to use. First, the seats were horrendous. They actually hurt my back after driving for more than two hours. At that time I was driving 3-4 hours every Friday and Sunday, and that really got to me. Second, is for how long the car is (compared to my S2000) there was no room for me and two full size adults in the back seat to sit comfortably. Personally, I could go for less trunk space and more leg room every single day. Besides that, the car performed its duties just fine while we lived in the Bronx. I got 31 mpg no matter how fast or slow the cruise control was set to, and never had even a hint of mechanical issues in 4 years besides general servicing in my garage. It worked out well.
Luckily, my girlfriend prefers sticks and speed so she traded it in the second it was put in her name for a Golf R. Those seats are much more comfortable. Our christmas card was sent out with this now.
Clay...Bill Clay
> James Gallagher
02/04/2014 at 18:52 |
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So much yes. I am in a similar situation, with my daily driver being a 17 year old Escort longroof (manual!) that, based on the horrifying shuddering at idle, can't decide if it wants to live or die. The interior is a depressing sea of unmatched shades of grey, changing gears is like stirring a spoon through mashed potatoes, new and exciting rattles and groans make themselves known on a daily basis, and the radiator resembles a colander in how much coolant it leaks. But it was only 2 grand, gets 37 MPG for my 40 mile commute, and dammit if I don't love that little shitbox.
maxabillion
> James Gallagher
02/04/2014 at 18:56 |
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It's not lack of knowledge that bothers enthusiasts (at least not this one) it's feigned knowledge. When someone pretends to know things that they have no clue about, it gets on the nerves of those who do know.
I'll admit that I catch myself trying to sounds smarter than I am from time to time. I have to tell myself that I'm being annoying.
SmokeandMirrors
> James Gallagher
02/04/2014 at 19:45 |
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I know that feel. I had a 1995 Cavalier and it was the best. It felt so solid, so safe, it was an amazing car to learn how to drive in. I realized in 2006 that it was 11 years old (it definitely didn't look its age!), and I sold it almost immediately after this realization. I replaced it with a Cobalt LS, and it was the worst decision I've ever made. :(
Volcoman
> All Motor Is Best Motor
02/04/2014 at 23:57 |
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I just got a '13 Corolla S Manual, moved up from a 2001 Acura TL. Maybe you can relate to me but I thought the Acura was waaaay more responsive with steering, and obviously more power. Damn I miss that car. Anyways, I agree the Corolla is light weight. I feel it when I need to do a quick stop.
sgoldste02
> James Gallagher
02/05/2014 at 07:13 |
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I'm 50 years old, and have been a car enthusiast for as long as I can remember. For years I bought nothing but Honda Civics and Accords. Always reliable, but not terribly interesting. Finally, in 2010, I bought myself a new Golf TDI. Finally, I thought, a German car, with German engineering, excellent build quality, and an interesting engine. I LOVED that car, but it was a reliability nightmare. It left me stranded twice, once while out of town on a national holiday when all businesses were closed. I ended up stuck for two days in a cheesy hotel with my dog in (get the irony of this) Mechanicsburg, PA. I sold the TDI after only owning it for 27 months and 30k miles. Fantastic car when it was running, but I just couldn't trust it.
I replaced the TDI with a 2012 Impreza. Not as entertaining to drive (except in the snow, when it rocks), but I trust it to get me where I'm going, every day, without worries.
I'll take reliability over engineering excellence that you can't trust any day.
willkinton247
> James Gallagher
02/05/2014 at 09:07 |
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This should totally be FP'd
09GT - now boosted
> James Gallagher
02/05/2014 at 12:31 |
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I too have been a car guy most of my life. My father was always working on our cars (tune-ups, breaks, shocks/struts, etc) but he always thought of his kids first and never had a truly fun car (since his AMX, anyway) until a '92 Chevy Beretta GTZ (190 hp Quad 4, 5 speed, < 2900 lbs).
I went through a '84 Pontiac 6000 STE (first car - loved it), '97 Malibu, '98 '01 Grand Am (4 cyl - but a fun car to hoon), '01 Aurora (V6, great car, but not exciting), and '08 Town & Country (have 2 kids = need minivan = mistake) before getting to a point (out of school/training, college fund started for kids, retirement plan in place) where I bought a (barely) used '09 Mustang GT for my "fun" car. And while I do love it, I appreciated all the cars I've ever had (even the minivan) for their own strengths and how they were mine at a point when I wasn't so financially secure.
So enjoy your car, and if you ever wave at me I'll be sure to wave back!
yurikaze
> James Gallagher
02/05/2014 at 14:09 |
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Amazing post.
It also really made me rethink my thoughts about my '96 Mustang GT automatic convertible being a bland non-enthusiast car.
Also don't think that "driving a Corolla" can so easily be passed off as an automatic let-down in car enthusiast circles. My AE86 GT-S would disagree.
Zzzzzzzzzz
> James Gallagher
02/05/2014 at 17:49 |
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I also drove a 2004 Corolla during college. At one point I was able to differentiate between the 03-04-05 models. It is still being driven today by my brother. I think it is a great car that is ultra reliable and efficient and it's simple enough to go from Point A to Point B.
What does annoy me however and this applies to every car are owners who put an obnoxious amount of stickers and stupid "performance" parts. They might as well put a huge sign next to their car saying "Look at me! I look fast".
Today I parked next to a 2009 Corolla. This guy had a million TRD stickers a mudflaps and disgusting tinted headlights and taillights and a bunch of disgusting modifications. I think at this point he loses sight what a corolla is a car that gets to Point A to point B. He ruined it.
jkeelsnc
> James Gallagher
08/04/2015 at 15:03 |
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It is silly to criticize someone for owning a Toyota. It may not have brilliant handling. What is brilliant is what makes it go and go and never quit. What is brilliant is that it has tremendous gas mileage and starts every time without fuss or worry. What is brilliant is driving 100’s or 1000’s of mile across a country like the US where you don’t want to break down in the middle of nowhere and the car will always get you to the next town or city or through that grueling 12 hour drive across 2 states. Don’t get me wrong. There are some cars that enthusiasts love that will mostly do that OK. But very few of them will do it as efficiently and reliably as a Toyota Camry, Corolla, or Yaris. Do not belittle the car that will last through anything and get huge cost savings at the gas pump because that IS the ridiculous Brilliance in such a car. Appreciate that and you will love it anyway.